Robyn’s Cherry Tree
Jo, together with wife Katie and son Finn, have planted a cherry tree in memory of their first child, Robyn: a brave baby girl whose life was very short but still allowed her determination and tenacity to shine through. This story is a gentle conversation about the significance of watching something grow and change in memory of a child.
It is also a celebration of sharing a communal garden and the richness it brings to their lives as a family.
JK: Did you initially intend to plant a tree for Robyn, or was it an idea that came with the passage of time?
Jo: Well, we intended to plant a tree, but we weren’t going to do it ourselves – we were going to sponsor a tree for her in a forest. But we never decided where we wanted to plant one; nowhere was quite right. We wanted the tree to be close enough by that we could watch it grow. But nowhere close by was perfect. Then my dad’s neighbour gave him a little sapling and they didn’t have anywhere to plant it, and they brought it up here and we just thought - this is the one. We’ve been able to plant it in the communal garden on our very own street.
We grew it in the place where we wanted Robyn to live, and where we’ll live with Finn. It’s part of the reason we picked here as a place to live, this communal garden. Bringing up kids in the city but with a community garden – it’s so much bigger a space than we could ever have hoped to have as our own garden. We get to meet more people from the street because of the garden – we’ll have something happening for bonfire night, and we had a summer bbq. Especially since covid, there’s just a brilliant community spirit around here – it feels like a really community focussed place to live, in the middle of a city.
One of the reasons that it was the perfect tree for us is that we went to Japan together, before Robyn was born, and loved seeing the blossom there – it’s so much more dramatic than it is here – so we have that personal connection with the cherry blossom. And, it’s such an overtly seasonal tree, so you really feel every bit of growth and development – that’s the whole idea of planting a tree and watching it grow, for us. And for our son, having something to watch grow as well. He helped us water it in the summer when it was dry, and he knows it’s his sister’s tree.
JK: It's been in the ground here since April hasn’t it– it’s really grown already! And it’ll be so beautiful when it starts to blossom.
Jo: It won’t ever be a gigantic tree, I think it’s meant to grow about 20-40 cm a year - it’s grown at least 20cm so far. Because there’s only one other tree here in this garden – the sycamore in the corner– the Cherry will become a real feature of the garden. It should provide some shade in the summer, and we’ll get a seating area put in under it.
JK: There’s something about the permanence of trees that makes us reach for them in memory of another person, isn’t there? Especially a person we hoped would outlive us.
Jo: After Robyn died I used to struggle with the seasons changing, because it meant that things were carrying inexorably on. But now I’ve got something to make those changes a positive thing; watching the tree develop and grow and change with the seasons. Though we were chatting about how it’s going to be a long winter, to wait and see how it does. It’s going to lose its leaves in the next few weeks then there’ll be nothing until March – over the very part of the year that’s the hardest for us because it includes Robyn’s birthday, and the anniversary of her death. And Christmas too – so I really hope it’s going to be alright over winter. I think it will be, it’s pretty well established. Hopefully in about 5 years, when Robyn would have been 10, it’ll be big enough to show over the fence, and everyone can enjoy walking past and seeing the blossom.
We haven’t done anything like this before, and I like to do things when I know they’re going to work, so this was a big step into the unknown, planting a tree. We [as musicians] spend our whole lives doing something we’re highly trained to do, and our work is often all about perfection. But nature isn’t about perfection, and it’s also not all about our planning – there’s little we can do over the winter to help the tree to succeed. We did at least build that wooden protective fence around it – we got in such a tizz about it because we only had half a day off to get it done, and it was so difficult to make. We couldn’t believe we’d spent our time off fighting with nails to build a pallet fence! But, it’s done the job – it’s protected it from footballs, and storms….
We haven’t added a plaque to Robyn’s tree – it is enough for us, just the tree itself.
JK: I’ll enjoy looking out for it each time I come past - I hope it grows to be even more strong and beautiful than it is already. Thank you so much for sharing these reflections, and this beautiful young tree.
Jo and her family have been raising funds for Glasgow’s Neonatal Intensive Care Unit since Robyn died. They hope to make the experiences of having a baby stay in the NICU a little bit easier in any way they can. They are currently raising money for books so that they can be immediately gifted to new parents to read to their babies, letting them experience the sound of their parent’s voice at a time when they’re not able to have touch contact regularly.
If you would like to contribute or read more about their fundraising, the link is here: Remarkable Rascal Robyn